Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

Guest column | Field notes from the end of life: My thoughts on living while dying - The Washington Post

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I can read

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

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I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

What life lesson did you learn the hard way?

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I can count

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

Why is Eric Clapton so roundly disliked among guitarists?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

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I understand how hurricane paths work

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I don’t buy bullshit

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I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

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I know who the president of Turkey really is

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

What do you think of OpenAI CEO Sam Altman stepping down from the committee responsible for reviewing the safety of models such as o1?

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

Which brand is the best home slippers in the Middle East?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

What is it like to experience sleep paralysis?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I see through liars

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

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I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

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I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have a reading level above third grade

What is the Abu Shusha massacre in Palestine?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I actually pay taxes

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

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I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have complete contempt for fakery